It's OK, I'm A Rich English Teacher, I Can Take Baths

I can't really decide if this is a TMI post. (Actually I guess I have considering the fact that it's posted.)

I mean, inherent in bathing is nudity. I'll try to be 'adult' about it...

Why am I writing about bathing? Because I clearly am having difficulty coming up with material? Because it could be a 'teach-able moment' (remember that bullshit phrase?)? Yes.

So, it's been insanely cold in Okinawa. A bitter 50 degrees-ish. I don't know exactly since I've been converted to Celsius, meters, and left-sided driving.

Though you are justified in laughing at me for complaining about a bitter 50 degrees. Trust me, it feels unbearably cold, especially when no buildings in Okinawa have heat. Getting up in the morning is such a nightmare, though I'm getting scientific about creating the absolute minimum amount of time between 'under blankets' and 'in shower'.

So, I've heard one of the best methods to deal with the cold without heating is to take a bath. And my bathing habits are not usually blog-post worthy, but when you bathe Japanese style, trust me, it's worth writing about.

Admittedly, this isn't my first Japanese bathing experience, my first was in a public bath in Tokyo...and that is an inappropriate blog topic.

So, as you may know the most important rule is to bathe before getting in the bath. You idiot.

Thankfully my apartment has a room solely dedicated to the shower/bath. Trust me, this is critical. Second most important is to get over any image issues and learn to enjoy squatting naked on stools while hosing yourself down like an elephant (not to exacerbate those body issues...).

Once clean, ease yourself into the bath, which must be painfully hot. For maximum enjoyment, the temperature difference between bath water and air temperature should be as great as possible. I suggest opening the windows of the apartment.

Baths are a bit of an anomaly in Japan. I seriously think they are deeper than they are long. And it's surprisingly not uncomfortable. Can I suggest a position like you're making a 'U' with your body? No? Ok then, sit with your legs crossed.

I'm not really the bathing type so once I was in I had no idea what to do with myself. Do I just sit here bored and naked? That seems like I'm asking for trouble...

Do I fall asleep? Do I get drunk? Do I read?

Traditionally, the bath is filled once and all the members of the house share the water (hence the importance of being clean before entering), but I don't see how this works since the water gets cold surprisingly fast. Once I had my fill I pulled the plug, while still in the bath. Which is what I imagine dying must feel like. Or interestingly, being born too I suppose.

Now I was naked and sitting inappropriately in an empty bathtub. It was time to get out. It's surprising how it was entirely fine a minute ago, but without water, was completely disturbing. Actually it was more like 5 minutes ago; yeah that's how deep the bath is. And it takes an honest 25 minutes to fill 3/4.

So draining that was definitely representative of death. Namely my financial death when I get the next gas bill.

But it's not a lie, I was warm (and bright, lobster red) the rest of the night.